don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
We are all done wearing pants today
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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