could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Randomize
