I queefed so loud it echoed.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
