Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
