That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Randomize
