Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
