it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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