got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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