And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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