Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
