I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Randomize
