i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize
