Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Randomize
