did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
this just has baby written all over it
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Randomize
