if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Randomize
