remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
