so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
