i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
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