Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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