I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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