I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
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