I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
