Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Randomize
