her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
