margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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