i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
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