I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
and you said cock pushups were impossible
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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