I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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