Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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