What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize
