I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Randomize
