is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Randomize