He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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