You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
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