He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
