they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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