i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
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