we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
