I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize