Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
