I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
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