remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
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