I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
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