remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
