i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
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