Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Green mimosas i think yes
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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