he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Randomize
