i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
no you cant smoke seaweed
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
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