We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
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