We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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